“Normally a quote goes here but fuck it! I’m not in the mood!” ~ ME!
Out of the blue, my mood has gone from okay to frickin horrible! I’ve been curled up in the fetal position on my bed for about an hour cursing the fact that I was conscious. Just when I felt like I was falling asleep, I had to pull myself up because I had to pee! God I hate that.
I’m here drinking cold coffee because I’m too lazy and irritable to put it in the microwave for 30 seconds.
I can’t remember if I have ever typed away when I was in a mood as foul as this. Maybe I have….I don’t remember, and maybe I should have before this. It helps to vent even though I have nothing to vent about ……or do I??
I’m pissed off for the sake of being pissed off. There is no positive thinking or whatever the hell else I’ve been preaching. Sometimes NOTHING works or helps and sometimes I just want to throw something through the fucking wall.
This is when I believe my diagnosis of bipolarism is real. Many days I think the pill dispensing doctors don’t know shit and tend to think I’m just like the rest of the population trying to get through a crappy day, in a miserable world. Maybe I’ll have days like this for the rest of my life and maybe there is no drug that will do any good.
I can’t make heads or tails of this world when I feel like this…. all the books I’ve read, all the views I have seem to disappear. Are we supposed to be fixing this planet or destroying it? Which works better in the scheme of reincarnation? A planet with a whole lot of bullshit and pain I suppose. I’m all over the place right now, I know!
Something struck a sensitive nerve with me yesterday which I think contributed to my mood this morning. Capitalism and free enterprise…. holy shit …do I really want to get started on this?? The thing that is single-handedly devouring every resource on the planet faster than it can be replaced. All for the sake of money….something that is a figment of our imagination. Money isn’t real, it’s something we humans have created. It’s meaningless….100% meaningless but it’s what drives everything! It’s disgusting.
You would think being born on a planet would give you some kind of birthright, like ….oh I dunno …..free health care! Free water! Being free to live in a damned field if I want without being told I’m trespassing or violating some dumb-ass law by blinking sideways! No….it’s never actually happened but this is what goes through my head when I am in a mood.
I feel like I woke up in a world created by the dumbest people, who picked the worst ideas, and then only half-assed followed through on them. Then after a few centuries of decay and stupidity, we end up here in the early 21st century wondering why nothing is working. Ugh…..I’m soooo not doing a thing today. Maybe you all shouldn’t either til the world wakes the hell up!
PS: To the people leaving SPAM comments on this site. They go directly to TRASH so cut the shit!