Saved by Slow Death

“In life there are no winners, only assholes with Swiss Bank Accounts.” ~ Matthew Lotti

I felt better after going off on my bitch-fest the other day, although, it was only a temporary fix as I’m a big ol’ A-hole again today. I learned something a couple days ago…. I learned to embrace my inner asshole (get your mind out of the gutter). I was watching a video of Deepak Chopra a friend had sent me five months ago. I forgot about it and never watched it until I was cleaning out my email inbox. I seemed to find it when I needed it. Continue reading

“Visualize this thing that you want, see it, feel it, believe in it. Make your mental blue print, and begin to build.” ~ Robert Collier

from my vision board

In a nutshell, the above quote is essentially the way a vision board works. Sounds stupid easy right? Well, it kind of is …and it kind of isn’t.

What IS a Vision Board?

A Vision Board is a visual representation of your desires, hopes, and dreams….it is a “vision” of your life. A collection of images which are pinned, tacked, taped, and/or glued to a board of your choice. Poster board, foam board, bulletin board, cork board, your wall, and hell, even a big piece of plywood (although not recommended). It’s really all up to you and your personal taste. Continue reading

“To die will be an awfully big adventure.” ~ Sir James M. Barrie

There are stories of people seeing bees, butterflies, humming birds, and dragonflies soon after someone significant dies in their lives. Although, the signs people see are not limited to insects or other animal life, but can also be anything that was significant in that person’s life. This phenomenon is referred to “After Death Communication.”

It may be a song, it may be sound, it may be a smell, but whatever it is, you must be open to it’s presence and awake enough to experience it or it may go unnoticed. I believe these signs are around us each and every day and we are too busy to notice something so simple most of the time. Continue reading

Just Some Thoughts…

~from Ruminations.com

I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.

I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.

There is great need for a sarcasm font.

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet? Continue reading

“You have succeeded in life when all you really want is only what you really need.” ~ Vernon Howard

I recently had a conversation with someone about why it often takes a traumatic event to wake a person up out of a zombi-like existence.  That’s what it took for me – it took almost dying.

Now that I look back over my life, I see I got slapped by life many times.  When I didn’t pay attention I would get a harder slap, and each slap I ignored would get harder and harder.

When I still didn’t respond, life punched me so hard it sent shock waves through my entire being  – in every dimension it occupies. Continue reading

I recently found these code of ethics -  I am unsure of where this originated and of it’s accuracy. Regardless of where it originated, I like it very much and I wanted to pass it on. So much common sense and an extraordinary respect for the earth and everything that calls it home.

Native Americans weren’t perfect, but the Europeans could have learned from them but instead they treated them with disrespect. Remember, it was the Native Americans who lived on the American continents for a very long time – everyone else is an immigrant.

Continue reading

“The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in.” ~ Morrie Schwartz

As you may know, I go through a bit of depression and anxiety over my past and begin reliving the nightmares when I felt abused and betrayed by people on meth, while I was using meth.

Yesterday was one of those days. For no reason at all, negative emotions flood through me leaving me angry, sad, depressed, and lonely as if I’m at the bottom of a dark, bottomless, pit. I try not to let it happen but some days it is overwhelming. Continue reading

“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” ~ Mahatma Gandhi

Intellectually, I know forgiving someone who has hurt me goes a long way in healing my emotional scars, but actually doing it is tough as hell.  Sometimes I think I’ve been successful but later realize I’ve forgiven no one.  All the pain is still there hurting as bad as it did years ago, sometimes worse. Continue reading

“Doctors are men who prescribe medicines of which they know little, to cure diseases of which they know less, in human beings of whom they know nothing.” ~ Voltaire

Here I go again… I am in asshole mode! I have repeatedly tried to write for the past three friggin weeks and have deleted what I write every time. My mood has been really fragile ever since the first week of April.  Bipolar disorder is a bitch!

I write something down, then feel it sounds stupid, then I get frustrated, then I get angry, then I hit delete. I’m hoping I can at least get this out so I can explain where my head is….or is not. Continue reading

“Inner peace is impossible without patience. Wisdom requires patience. Spiritual growth implies the mastery of patience. Patience allows the unfolding of destiny to proceed at its own unhurried pace.” ~ Dr. Brian Weiss

Reincarnation – The idea of having to reincarnate on this earth was a depressing idea for me. One lifetime here seemed hard enough and it did not feel fair to have to repeat another lifetime a second, third, not to mention, a one hundredth time.

In the last few years I have become more interested in the subject. I was watching The Oprah Winfrey Show one day and her guest was Dr. Brian Weiss who does work in past life regression. Continue reading